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Cashmere
***
Friday, October 7th, 2016...
"متأكدة ان عادي؟"
I asked Jana. We were on the way to Khalid's chalet as she didn't want to go alone.
I'd told my mother I was going to Jana's chalet anyway.
"اي حيل عادي شفيج؟"
She said as she took another selfie of herself.
She looked pretty in her white sundress, which she was wearing a bright blue two piece swim suit underneath if you looked close enough. Her hair was in long waves down her back and she looked a bit older than she usually did with all the makeup on her face.
"امبيه جد ماني قادرة انطررر، كلب ولهت عليه"
She said.
My mind remembered what Kadi and Rawan had said about her, but she was the only friend I had. Besides, who cares?
I looked at my phone.
Fahad: 9ij yaya bnaider? 3ala ay share3?
I asked Jana for the specifics and she told me, which I sent Fahad.
Fahad: eeh yamnaa eb 5 degayeg chethy
Me: wow ma9adeeg
Fahad: ra7ya weya friends wala family?
Me: Jana bas loool
Fahad: haha khoush...shkether yabeelich?
Me: chithy 10 minutes. tabby nsawy shay??
Fahad: yallaah, jana ok ma3anaa??
Me: laa i think bteg3ad weya her cousins eshwayy
I couldn't tell him she was going to hang out with her boyfriend, obviously.
Fahad: okk khoush. gouleely lama tou9leen
Me: inshallaah
I was finally talking to him on Whataspp, as did Jana with Khalid.
"امبيه حبيبي مزهبلنا غرفة ومنظفين الحمام سباحة"
She gushed.
"حبيبتي انا ماني سابحة"
I said.
"يالمليقة لييش؟"
She said.
"امبيه ترى الحين الساعة خمس الماي بارد"
I said.
"jaccuzi اكيد عندهم"
She said, almost dreamily.
We arrived soon enough and I sent Fahad a message that I'd arrived.
Fahad: amurech 3ugub 15 mins?
Me: eeeh perfect!! wain benrou7??
Fahad: starbucks ra7aal shrayich?
Me: allaah okk
I was a bit worried though, would anyone run into us there?
The only person I wished would see us together was Rawan.
I smiled at the thought.
"Wow," Jana said as she got out of the car.
The chalet was a beautiful modern building with white and wood textures everywhere. The lighting was on point too against the dark evening skies.
"ما شاء الله"
I said.
"حيّاكم"
I heard Khalid say as he leaned by the gate. He was dressed in a pair of gray training pants and a white shirt.
"Khalid!" Jana said before she ran to him. She dropped her duffel bag and hugged him, tightening her arms around him and burying her face around her neck. I was definitely third-wheeling.
"شلونج منيرة؟"
He asked me.
"الحمدلله"
I said with a polite smile as he ushered us inside.
We walked past the gate and passed by a huge garden to get inside the chalet, which was breathtaking. There were glass walls almost everywhere and one large wall overlooked a pool in the middle of the plot. I was still in awe.
Jana won the jackpot.
"امبيه يعقد"
Jana said.
"جد"
I could only manage to say.
"شكرا"
Khalid said with a smile as he placed his hands in his pockets.
"تفضلو"
He said, pointing to the couches in the living room.
We walked on the marble floor to the couches, were we sat looking at the pool in front of us.
"شتشربون؟"
He asked us.
"ولا شي مشكور"
I said.
"يالله عاد، جنى شفيها رفيجتج"
He said and I blushed.
"مافيها شي بس بيمرها الحبيب عقب جم دقيقة"
She said as she wiggled her brows at me.
My face was burning up now.
Khalid chuckled and sat on the seat next to Jana. It was definitely awkward and I felt like I was so getting in their way.
"بالشاليه؟ tour خالد عادي اخذ"
Jana said in her raspy voice.
"يالله، منيرة بتيين؟"
He said as he grabbed her hand.
"لا عادي"
I said with a smile and Jana smiled at me, like she was thanking me.
Would Fahad and I be this intimate? Would he be grabbing my hand and would I be hugging him? Maybe, if no one was watching.
I sat on my phone going through my snapchat stories until Fahad texted he was out. I gulped.
I quickly looked at my reflection against the mirror by the door.
I was wearing a pair of white jeans with an olive green shirt. My hair was in natural waves down my back and my makeup was so minimum. I didn't think I'd actually be meeting up with him.
I opened the door and walked to the gate to see him in a Wrangler with a smile on his face, showing off his dimples. He looked so hot especially with his tan and the backwards cap on his head.
"Hi," I said.
"اهلا، حياج"
He said as he opened the passenger door from me on the inside.
I took a deep breath. My mother would kill me if she knew.
"شخبارج؟"
He said with a smile as he drove on the main road now.
"والله الحمدلله. انت شلونك؟"
I asked him.
"الحمدلله"
He said. I could smell his cologne now, he smelled so so good.
"هذا شاليهكم اللي طلعتي منّه؟"
He asked me.
"جنى cousin لا مال"
I lied.
"وايد حلو ما شاء الله"
He said.
"اي وايد"
I agreed.
"عاد تصدق مو رايحة الشاليه من يمكن سنة ونص"
I said.
"لا والله، ليش؟ انا كل ويكند هني"
He said.
"محّد فاضي"
I said with a chuckle.
"Hard luck," he said with a smile.
Why were we shyer in real life than in text?
We were close by Starbucks now and I felt my stomach tighten up in anxiety. What would people think of me?
"يالله؟"
He said as he parked.
I could see tons of young people now inside and coming out of the coffee shop.
"اي"
I said as I got out too.
I walked next to him and he opened the door for me to get in. He was right by my side within three seconds. The line was pretty long but at least it would give us time to talk.
I looked around to see if I knew anyone familiar but I didn't. I sort of did wish I'd see Rawan.
"دقيقة"
He muttered to me before he went to say hi to a group of guys. I turned my head the other way, hoping none of them would memorize my face if they'd realized Fahad and I were together.
"وايد زحمة"
He said with a sigh as he returned.
"اي حييل"
I said.
"تبين نطلع؟"
He asked me.
"لا حسافة دام يينا خلنطلب"
I said and he smiled.
We couldn't do much talking since it was so crowded but we managed to order and pick up the drinks. At this point it was so crowded I didn't think anyone noticed we were together.
"فكة"
He said as we walked out of Starbucks and to his car.
I laughed. "Jaad."
He placed his cold brew in one container while I placed mine in the other one.
"شفينّا ما شغلنا شي؟"
He said as he plugged his phone into the AUX cord.
The first song was an Iraqi one but he changed it.
"الله خلها تكفا"
I begged him and he raised his brows at me.
"تحلفين؟"
He said and I laughed.
"اييي احلى شي"
I replied.
"صدميني بعد"
He said and I laughed.
"الصراحة mcchicken توقعتج"
He confessed.
"لا غلطااان"
I said and he laughed.
"عادي اطالع شنو عندك؟"
I said and he nodded.
I went through his Soundcloud.
"امبيه لا خطييير"
I said as I played a song I liked.
"يالله عاد لا لا لا ما اصدق"
He said surprised and I laughed, singing along. He sang along too but we burst out laughing.
I was really starting to enjoy this.
We stopped back at the chalet.
"؟cruise مابي اطلع، تبي"
I said and he grinned.
"يالله"
He said as he drove back on the road again.
"Next?" he said and I played another one.
He started to dance in the car and I began to laugh, he turned to me and smiled at my reaction. God, it warmed me up all over. Now I knew how Jana felt with Khalid. That showing affection actually made sense, even if neither Fahad nor I did anything.
His phone rang and he unplugged it from the cord to pick it up.
"هلا يوسف"
He said.
"يالله كاني راد"
He said before he hung up.
"اخخخ لازم ارد"
He sighed.
"Oh..." I only managed to say.
"بس حدّي كيّفت"
I said with a smile.
"اي انا بعد، قوليلي متى تكونين بالشاليه. اتمنّى مو عقب السنة ونص"
He quipped and I laughed.
"اكيد"
I said.
He dropped me off at Khalid's chalet again.
"اكلمج عيل"
He said and I nodded.
"ان شاء الله"
I replied as I got out.
He smiled before he drove away and I sighed.
It all ended too soon.
I walked through the gates and passed by the garden to get inside the entrance. Only I stopped in my tracks and felt my heart drop to my stomach when I saw them...Jana and Khalid. They were completely over each other on the couch with Jana wearing nothing but her two-piece swim suit.
Khalid's hands roamed over her body as did his mouth while she completely let him in, running her hands over his back.
I froze, I didn't know what to do.
I gulped and tiptoed back to the garden where I took a deep breath in and exhaled.
She was only sixteen, he was twenty-seven. Was this wrong? Was I wrong for thinking it was wrong?
All I knew was that I couldn't do anything about it.
I sat on my phone in the garden until it was almost dead. How was I supposed to go back inside and not see them all over each other again?
I had an idea.
I walked back to the gate and closed it behind me then called Jana.
She picked up on the sixth ring. She sounded like she'd just run a marathon.
"جنوي انا برة ماقدر ادخل"
I said, hoping I didn't sound like something was wrong.
"Okay digeega," she said before we hung up.
I tried not to go there...to think if they went further than what I'd seen them do.
"انقفل عليج؟"
Khalid said with a smile as he opened the gate for me.
I gulped. I was suddenly so intimidated by him.
"اي"
I said with a nervous chuckle as he ushered me inside. His shirt was slightly crumpled and his hair was messy too.
I walked back inside the chalet again to see Jana patting the couches like nothing had ever happened. She was back in her dress, fortunately and Khalid went outside for a smoke.
"ها شلون طلعتج؟"
She asked me as I sat down. She smiled, interested in what I had to say.
"والله زينة، رحنا ستاربكس"
I told her.
"Ahaa...inzain did he make a move?" she asked me, raising a brow.
"!لا"
I said with a chuckle, nudging her.
"انتي شصار معاكم؟"
I asked her, now that she opened the subject.
She grinned slyly and looked outside to see Khalid, who was busy smoking before turning to me with wide eyes.
"امبييه بدعنااا"
She gushed.
"Kan the best make out session ever," she said with a chuckle.
I could only stare at her...I didn't know what to say.
"امبيه شفتي ويهج؟ شفيييج ترى حيييل عادي حدّج بريئة"
She said, laughing again and I chuckled.
"اول شي كنت احاتي ان حسباله ما ا عرف وجذي بس انصدممم"
She said, still laughing.
"اشوه عيل"
I said, trying to laugh.
"...بس جد كل مالي واحبه زيادة"
She gushed.
Should I be worried for her? But she looked happy, and if she was happy then that was all that mattered.
Cashmere
***
Friday, October 7th, 2016...
"متأكدة ان عادي؟"
I asked Jana. We were on the way to Khalid's chalet as she didn't want to go alone.
I'd told my mother I was going to Jana's chalet anyway.
"اي حيل عادي شفيج؟"
She said as she took another selfie of herself.
She looked pretty in her white sundress, which she was wearing a bright blue two piece swim suit underneath if you looked close enough. Her hair was in long waves down her back and she looked a bit older than she usually did with all the makeup on her face.
"امبيه جد ماني قادرة انطررر، كلب ولهت عليه"
She said.
My mind remembered what Kadi and Rawan had said about her, but she was the only friend I had. Besides, who cares?
I looked at my phone.
Fahad: 9ij yaya bnaider? 3ala ay share3?
I asked Jana for the specifics and she told me, which I sent Fahad.
Fahad: eeh yamnaa eb 5 degayeg chethy
Me: wow ma9adeeg
Fahad: ra7ya weya friends wala family?
Me: Jana bas loool
Fahad: haha khoush...shkether yabeelich?
Me: chithy 10 minutes. tabby nsawy shay??
Fahad: yallaah, jana ok ma3anaa??
Me: laa i think bteg3ad weya her cousins eshwayy
I couldn't tell him she was going to hang out with her boyfriend, obviously.
Fahad: okk khoush. gouleely lama tou9leen
Me: inshallaah
I was finally talking to him on Whataspp, as did Jana with Khalid.
"امبيه حبيبي مزهبلنا غرفة ومنظفين الحمام سباحة"
She gushed.
"حبيبتي انا ماني سابحة"
I said.
"يالمليقة لييش؟"
She said.
"امبيه ترى الحين الساعة خمس الماي بارد"
I said.
"jaccuzi اكيد عندهم"
She said, almost dreamily.
We arrived soon enough and I sent Fahad a message that I'd arrived.
Fahad: amurech 3ugub 15 mins?
Me: eeeh perfect!! wain benrou7??
Fahad: starbucks ra7aal shrayich?
Me: allaah okk
I was a bit worried though, would anyone run into us there?
The only person I wished would see us together was Rawan.
I smiled at the thought.
"Wow," Jana said as she got out of the car.
The chalet was a beautiful modern building with white and wood textures everywhere. The lighting was on point too against the dark evening skies.
"ما شاء الله"
I said.
"حيّاكم"
I heard Khalid say as he leaned by the gate. He was dressed in a pair of gray training pants and a white shirt.
"Khalid!" Jana said before she ran to him. She dropped her duffel bag and hugged him, tightening her arms around him and burying her face around her neck. I was definitely third-wheeling.
"شلونج منيرة؟"
He asked me.
"الحمدلله"
I said with a polite smile as he ushered us inside.
We walked past the gate and passed by a huge garden to get inside the chalet, which was breathtaking. There were glass walls almost everywhere and one large wall overlooked a pool in the middle of the plot. I was still in awe.
Jana won the jackpot.
"امبيه يعقد"
Jana said.
"جد"
I could only manage to say.
"شكرا"
Khalid said with a smile as he placed his hands in his pockets.
"تفضلو"
He said, pointing to the couches in the living room.
We walked on the marble floor to the couches, were we sat looking at the pool in front of us.
"شتشربون؟"
He asked us.
"ولا شي مشكور"
I said.
"يالله عاد، جنى شفيها رفيجتج"
He said and I blushed.
"مافيها شي بس بيمرها الحبيب عقب جم دقيقة"
She said as she wiggled her brows at me.
My face was burning up now.
Khalid chuckled and sat on the seat next to Jana. It was definitely awkward and I felt like I was so getting in their way.
"بالشاليه؟ tour خالد عادي اخذ"
Jana said in her raspy voice.
"يالله، منيرة بتيين؟"
He said as he grabbed her hand.
"لا عادي"
I said with a smile and Jana smiled at me, like she was thanking me.
Would Fahad and I be this intimate? Would he be grabbing my hand and would I be hugging him? Maybe, if no one was watching.
I sat on my phone going through my snapchat stories until Fahad texted he was out. I gulped.
I quickly looked at my reflection against the mirror by the door.
I was wearing a pair of white jeans with an olive green shirt. My hair was in natural waves down my back and my makeup was so minimum. I didn't think I'd actually be meeting up with him.
I opened the door and walked to the gate to see him in a Wrangler with a smile on his face, showing off his dimples. He looked so hot especially with his tan and the backwards cap on his head.
"Hi," I said.
"اهلا، حياج"
He said as he opened the passenger door from me on the inside.
I took a deep breath. My mother would kill me if she knew.
"شخبارج؟"
He said with a smile as he drove on the main road now.
"والله الحمدلله. انت شلونك؟"
I asked him.
"الحمدلله"
He said. I could smell his cologne now, he smelled so so good.
"هذا شاليهكم اللي طلعتي منّه؟"
He asked me.
"جنى cousin لا مال"
I lied.
"وايد حلو ما شاء الله"
He said.
"اي وايد"
I agreed.
"عاد تصدق مو رايحة الشاليه من يمكن سنة ونص"
I said.
"لا والله، ليش؟ انا كل ويكند هني"
He said.
"محّد فاضي"
I said with a chuckle.
"Hard luck," he said with a smile.
Why were we shyer in real life than in text?
We were close by Starbucks now and I felt my stomach tighten up in anxiety. What would people think of me?
"يالله؟"
He said as he parked.
I could see tons of young people now inside and coming out of the coffee shop.
"اي"
I said as I got out too.
I walked next to him and he opened the door for me to get in. He was right by my side within three seconds. The line was pretty long but at least it would give us time to talk.
I looked around to see if I knew anyone familiar but I didn't. I sort of did wish I'd see Rawan.
"دقيقة"
He muttered to me before he went to say hi to a group of guys. I turned my head the other way, hoping none of them would memorize my face if they'd realized Fahad and I were together.
"وايد زحمة"
He said with a sigh as he returned.
"اي حييل"
I said.
"تبين نطلع؟"
He asked me.
"لا حسافة دام يينا خلنطلب"
I said and he smiled.
We couldn't do much talking since it was so crowded but we managed to order and pick up the drinks. At this point it was so crowded I didn't think anyone noticed we were together.
"فكة"
He said as we walked out of Starbucks and to his car.
I laughed. "Jaad."
He placed his cold brew in one container while I placed mine in the other one.
"شفينّا ما شغلنا شي؟"
He said as he plugged his phone into the AUX cord.
The first song was an Iraqi one but he changed it.
"الله خلها تكفا"
I begged him and he raised his brows at me.
"تحلفين؟"
He said and I laughed.
"اييي احلى شي"
I replied.
"صدميني بعد"
He said and I laughed.
"الصراحة mcchicken توقعتج"
He confessed.
"لا غلطااان"
I said and he laughed.
"عادي اطالع شنو عندك؟"
I said and he nodded.
I went through his Soundcloud.
"امبيه لا خطييير"
I said as I played a song I liked.
"يالله عاد لا لا لا ما اصدق"
He said surprised and I laughed, singing along. He sang along too but we burst out laughing.
I was really starting to enjoy this.
We stopped back at the chalet.
"؟cruise مابي اطلع، تبي"
I said and he grinned.
"يالله"
He said as he drove back on the road again.
"Next?" he said and I played another one.
He started to dance in the car and I began to laugh, he turned to me and smiled at my reaction. God, it warmed me up all over. Now I knew how Jana felt with Khalid. That showing affection actually made sense, even if neither Fahad nor I did anything.
His phone rang and he unplugged it from the cord to pick it up.
"هلا يوسف"
He said.
"يالله كاني راد"
He said before he hung up.
"اخخخ لازم ارد"
He sighed.
"Oh..." I only managed to say.
"بس حدّي كيّفت"
I said with a smile.
"اي انا بعد، قوليلي متى تكونين بالشاليه. اتمنّى مو عقب السنة ونص"
He quipped and I laughed.
"اكيد"
I said.
He dropped me off at Khalid's chalet again.
"اكلمج عيل"
He said and I nodded.
"ان شاء الله"
I replied as I got out.
He smiled before he drove away and I sighed.
It all ended too soon.
I walked through the gates and passed by the garden to get inside the entrance. Only I stopped in my tracks and felt my heart drop to my stomach when I saw them...Jana and Khalid. They were completely over each other on the couch with Jana wearing nothing but her two-piece swim suit.
Khalid's hands roamed over her body as did his mouth while she completely let him in, running her hands over his back.
I froze, I didn't know what to do.
I gulped and tiptoed back to the garden where I took a deep breath in and exhaled.
She was only sixteen, he was twenty-seven. Was this wrong? Was I wrong for thinking it was wrong?
All I knew was that I couldn't do anything about it.
I sat on my phone in the garden until it was almost dead. How was I supposed to go back inside and not see them all over each other again?
I had an idea.
I walked back to the gate and closed it behind me then called Jana.
She picked up on the sixth ring. She sounded like she'd just run a marathon.
"جنوي انا برة ماقدر ادخل"
I said, hoping I didn't sound like something was wrong.
"Okay digeega," she said before we hung up.
I tried not to go there...to think if they went further than what I'd seen them do.
"انقفل عليج؟"
Khalid said with a smile as he opened the gate for me.
I gulped. I was suddenly so intimidated by him.
"اي"
I said with a nervous chuckle as he ushered me inside. His shirt was slightly crumpled and his hair was messy too.
I walked back inside the chalet again to see Jana patting the couches like nothing had ever happened. She was back in her dress, fortunately and Khalid went outside for a smoke.
"ها شلون طلعتج؟"
She asked me as I sat down. She smiled, interested in what I had to say.
"والله زينة، رحنا ستاربكس"
I told her.
"Ahaa...inzain did he make a move?" she asked me, raising a brow.
"!لا"
I said with a chuckle, nudging her.
"انتي شصار معاكم؟"
I asked her, now that she opened the subject.
She grinned slyly and looked outside to see Khalid, who was busy smoking before turning to me with wide eyes.
"امبييه بدعنااا"
She gushed.
"Kan the best make out session ever," she said with a chuckle.
I could only stare at her...I didn't know what to say.
"امبيه شفتي ويهج؟ شفيييج ترى حيييل عادي حدّج بريئة"
She said, laughing again and I chuckled.
"اول شي كنت احاتي ان حسباله ما ا عرف وجذي بس انصدممم"
She said, still laughing.
"اشوه عيل"
I said, trying to laugh.
"...بس جد كل مالي واحبه زيادة"
She gushed.
Should I be worried for her? But she looked happy, and if she was happy then that was all that mattered.
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