Don't Forget Me (56)

I was texting Zaid in the living room. We texted for so long and so much that I had to charge my phone five times.

My mother walked in, wayihha china a7ad ma36eeha 6rag.

"Yuma shfeech?" I sai as I stood up from the couch while my mother sat down so I sat down with her.

"Khaltich Salwa daga 3alay," she said.

Shit, this was not good.

"Inzain?" I said. She huffed.

"Faisal kan yabe yshoufich mara thanya bas gltlihum inich makh6ouba 7ag a7ad thani," she said. Why did she even say that?

"Inzain?" I said.

"Dara ina Zaid uhwa ili kha6bich oo khaltich Salwa 6arishatli video. Omniyah shinu hatha?" she said, almost yelling.

I gulped.

"Yuma hal video qadeem, kan 9'3eer ihni oo hatha gabl la yt'3ayar," I told her.

"Omniyah hal video chayid, shinu hatha?" she said, unbelieving.

"Yuma gltlich ta'3ayar," I begged her.

"Hatha mata'6mineen mayrid nafs awal," she said.

"Yuma tara bas kan cham shahar chithi!" I explained.

"Bas ha?" she said.

"Yuma 7aram tara wallah 7ail mt7asif 3ala illi sawa oo bas khala9 yabi y9ik ilmaw'6ou3," I said. This couldn't be real. I wanted to kill Faisal.

"Oo kalamt ubouch tawa. Essa galla ina kan yt3amal ma3ah?" she said. So now Essa ili lail7een mayadri 3ani faj2a raz wayha?

I'd visited him a couple of times every month for the past three years and he'd always pretend I wasn't there. At first I thought it was maybe the addiction taking its toll on him, but it turns out he didn't really believe I was his sister, like chinna wa7da mu 9ijiya 3nda. I wasn't really mad as I knew it was just his wrong way of thinking from everything that had impacted him, it just made me sad a bit.

In every visit I'd force myself to make conversation, to which he'd mutter a couple of words and that was it. There was no use of trying. So I slowly reduced my visits, just in case my visits were making him miserable and therefore less likely to recover from his addiction.

I thought it was unfortunate; I'd honestly believed that this was an opportunity for us to reconcile our already nonexistent relationship, to finally have that sibling bond that I'd never had. However, it was anything but...

I was so pissed at both Faisal and Essa for trying to "look out" for me when all they did that for was out of spite.

"Gltlich yuma bas cham shahar kan chithi!" I said, and before I realized it tears were streaming down my face.
"3ayal laish ma ista3yal oo kha6abni? Laish n6ar thalath isneen 3ashan yakh6bni?! Yuma tkfain, mara7 ar'6a b a7ad '3aira!" I said. I finally said it.

My mother only stared at me.

"Omniyah shbigouloun 3ankum itha khathaitee? Ygouloun 3anna li3eeb oo 3annich maga9a," she said. I couldn't believe what I was listening.

"Ubai yuma ana sh3alay mn shigoulouna ilnas? Ana ili batzawaja wala uhma?" I said as I cried.

"Yuma 7aram 3alaich, tadreen shkithir uhwa yabeeni oo ana abee," I said as I shook my head. She only looked at the ground and turned around.

***
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